Ste(funny)

How convenient that JK Rowling made Tom Marvolo Riddle equal I Am Lord Voldemort when it’s obviously supposed to be Mr. Tom, A Dildo Lover.

(Source: earlgreyer)

squeakyfangirl:

dftbhailey-42:

rainyohead:

dftbhailey-42:

rainyohead:

morrissarty:

meladoodle:

why the fuck aren’t glue sticks square so you can get the corners

you are a genius

how are you supose to screw them down if they’re square then?

maybe you could push them up?

How do you push them back down?

A lever on the side like one of those multiple-color click pens, so you could push/pull it up and down?

Only on tumblr will you have 20,000+ people discussing glue sticks.

Half dollars is a thing guys. They are real, not a myth.

ste-fan-ie:

So I went to the store earlier today, and all I had was 2 dollars a bunch of pennies and a half dollar. My Total was 2.20 or something of the sort…and I hand the cashier the two bills and my half dollar.

His response was, I kid you not, “Sorry, we don’t accept Mexican money here.”

My Jaw dropped, you’re denying my money because I’m mexican???? What in the actual fuck??? And he hands me back the half dollar, I was speech-less. I look at the half dollar, and then look back to the cashier, confused…

He then asks me, “do you have any other change?”

I thought, ‘oh, OH.’ He thought my half dollar was mexican currency. So I laugh awkwardly and I tell him it’s a half dollar, it’s american currency.

And he frowns and takes it back and he just shakes his head a few times, flipping it in his fingers until I get impatient and tell him to read it. He does, he’s still confussed.

At this point, I’m getting really annoyed and tell him I’ll just pay him in pennies instead. So I did.

American education everybody, I’m just so proud of our generation.

sanderlust:

my biggest fear is falling and dying in the shower and my family finding me naked

thorki:

I JUST SAW A GUY AT WALMART AND HE LOOKED LIKE MORGAN FREEMAN AND HE CAUGHT ME LOOKING AT HIM AND HE POINTED AT ME AND SAID “IM NOT MORGAN FREEMAN”

jaaaaaaaaaackfrost:

two things i will never grasp in life

• what to write in birthday cards
• what to do when people are singing happy birthday to me

(Source: jaclcfrost)